The Ugliest Man Alive

Cast: Tycho, Gabe

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

{Tycho is seated on the couch, Xbox 360 controller in hand. Gabe is behind him, grasping the couch, appearing eager.}
Gabe: You getting your golfer set up for Tiger? Here, let me help.
Gabe: No, that's not right. You're thinner than that. More gaunt. Like a mummy.

Panel 2

{Gabe is now using the controller, now with a more stern look. Tycho is touching his nose, appearing somewhat hurt.}
Gabe: The nose won't go any bigger? Really?
Gabe: And the hair is more ridiculous. It should be dry and coarse. Like the straw hair on a terrifying scarecrow.

Panel 3

{Tycho's eyes simply open wider.}
Gabe: Is that in there? Can we do that?
Gabe: No, and the skin's paler, like a dead thing. You know, waxy?
Gabe: Is there a way to add a slimy sheen?

External Links Edit

Preceded by:
October 18, 2006
Penny Arcade strips Followed by:
October 23, 2006

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